Shine in our hearts, Lord Jesus, and light us up so that you shine out of us as well. Amen
Readings Let's reflect a bit today on theophany – that's a word for things like what we just read, Moses seeing God face to face and the disciples seeing Jesus transfigured into light and talking to Moses and Elijah, and God's voice coming out of a cloud. Theophany is when God reveals himself in ways that we can't deny, when God shows up in ways that freak us out because they are so real, when something happens that moves us so deeply, we either say or do idiotic things trying to make some kind of response - or we don't' talk about it at all because we can't find any words that will work to really convey what happened. You may not often talk about those experiences, or maybe you only tell one other person or a couple of people you really trust, but there is no way you can ever forget what you saw or what you heard or what you felt in that moment. And there's no way you can go back to how it was not knowing that things like that are real. Even though later, you may question whether you dreamed it or imagined it, deep down you know you didn't make it up. And I think we hope that what we experience in moments like that is the true reality. We hope that what we see around us in mundane daily life is just a pale reflection of the way things really are, what life really is at the core. The difficulty in hope, though is it's a (seemingly) very fragile thing, and you hesitate to lay it out completely because you're not sure it could survive disappointment. Or maybe you know somehow deeply that if you completely hope for all you desire, there's no way you could stay in control – you'd be at the mercy of how God responds. And if you laid out your deepest hope to God, you couldn't stay aloof from him and safe from what you fear would happen if you found that God either doesn't want or isn't able to fulfill what you hope for – that your hope may in fact be foundationless. You think your hope is what keeps you alive, and you couldn't survive losing it. So you hedge your prayers, you pray for what seems reasonable, for what God couldn't refuse; you pray in ways that give God an "out" in case he doesn't answer or doesn't want to or maybe isn't actually able to – because maybe he doesn't actually exist … But why do you think we have hopes if there isn't actually a reality they're based on? Thomas Aquinas hashed this question out from both the theological and philosophical point of view, and he says we're right to hope - because God does exist and God is good – and he hasn't made a desire without its object. We have hope because there is such a thing as its fulfillment. Aquinas says that if we have a desire, not only does its object exist, but it's attainable and it's also good – in fact, it's intended. God isn't cruel – he hasn't made us so that we hope for things that don't exist or are bad for us or that he has no intention of giving us – so that we'll eternally be frustrated in our deepest desires. No, God is good, and he's given us good desires, and he's also put in us a desire for himself as the greatest good, so when moments of theophany happen, we are getting a glimpse, a taste of what is most deeply true about God's relationship to us and his love for us. So, if what we hope for is predicated on a real object, then its fulfillment is possible, and if in fact, this fulfillment was designed and intended by God and is in God's power to grant, then we should have no fear in asking for it – because it's already what God also wants: our wholeness, our integration. What you most deeply desire… already is – and is in God's power to give you. Are you willing to risk asking for it? And I mean hopes – those things you most deeply ache for, that you don't think are even reasonable, that you don't think you have any business asking God for because there's no way they could be accomplished. It would take a miracle… That's what I'm talking about –what kind of church is this if it's not about miraculous expectation? So I'll tell you what I've started doing as a result of this thought process: I've started asking God for what I hope for St. John's: for you as a community and you as individuals. I invite you to do the same… Hope everything you can imagine for us and ask God to do it. And don't hedge or make qualifications to "let God off the hook" in case it doesn't happen – that is your fear and attempt to control the situation so that you can't be disappointed. Instead, try risking disappointment on God. I'm praying that God starts to breathe on your hearts so that the little embers of hope in there start heating you up inside and even starting to hurt – some of the prophets have said God's word can feel like a fire in your bones. I'm hoping that what he desires for us begins to burn inside us also, until it starts to shine out in our faces and in what we say and what we do. What are y'all waiting for anyway? "Remember that you are dust, and to dust you'll return." An interesting thing about fire, which I've learned from the firefighters in Vidor, is that it doesn't even have to touch its fuel to ignite it. A fire in one spot can gradually heat an entire area, and anything that can be fuel, when it reaches its ignition temperature, will spontaneously combust at that point. So, in a room where there's a fire in one corner, when the entire room reaches a certain temperature, will completely erupt in flame everywhere.
It's called flashover. Here is another video showing fire behavior leading up to a rollover (burning across the ceiling) and then a flashover (everything erupting in flame). You know somebody's been burning churches in east Texas, and the interesting thing about that, I think, is they're confusing a symbol of God's power with the thing itself, as though a fire in a church building would destroy the Church. It's the same mistake people make when they try to kill Christians – when they tried to kill Christ. In our worship, fire represents to us God's presence with us in the Holy Spirit, and at Jayde's baptism last week, we lit a candle to symbolize the light of Christ in her heart. Fire is a symbol of God's presence because, like fire, God is not safe, not predictable. Talking about flashover, maybe Pentecost was something like that. My prayer is that during Lent, God will breathe on you and start a little fire in a corner of your heart, and we'll see what happens by Pentecost. Amen.
Bob and Joyce are driving to Houston. As they come into the city, traffic starts to pick up. Just as they enter a construction zone, Bob spots a car stalled, partly in their lane because of the construction barricade. He looks in the mirror to move over, and there’s a semi in the other lane – there’s not enough space for all three vehicles – and nowhere for Bob and Joyce to go. They both flinch, expecting impact – and then, somehow, they’re on the other side. “How did you do that?” Joyce asks, amazed. “I don’t know,” Bob says. “It wasn’t me.” How do you know God is real? Have you ever seen God? Lots of you have children and grandchildren. Think back to holding that brand new little baby for the first time – those perfect, delicate ears, beautiful eyelashes and tiny fingernails. Look at your own hand and the lines on your knuckles, the roadmap of purple veins just under your skin. “The God who made the world and everything in it, he who is Lord of heaven and earth, does not live in shrines made by human hands, nor is he served by human hands, as though he needed anything, since he himself gives to all mortals life and breath and all things.” (Acts 17:24-25) It feels like this is true – that there must be somebody responsible - It feels like there must be a God, but how do we know God is real if we can’t see God? Can you see your eyelashes? Why not? Because they’re too close to your eyes. Maybe we can’t see God because God is too close. Paul tells the people in Athens, “indeed he is not far from each one of us.” Can you see your heart? Why not? Because it’s inside of you. Maybe we can’t see God because God is inside of us. Jesus tells his disciples, “You know [the Holy Spirit], because he abides with you, and he will be in you.”
Just because you can’t see something, doesn’t mean it isn’t there. Sometimes you can feel what you can’t see You can’t see your eyelashes because they are too close to your eyes. But, you can move the tip of your finger near your eye and feel the tiny hairs brushing against your skin, so you know they are there. You can’t see your heart, because your heart is inside you - but you can put your thumb in the little space between your collar bones and feel bom-bom as it pumps blood through the arteries in your neck. I can’t see God, but there are times when I feel that God is with me. I remember once in early spring, taking a walk in the middle of the afternoon, and suddenly, I felt that God was walking with me. I didn’t see him, but I knew he was there. It seemed that if I leaned my head over, it would be resting on his shoulder. I remember how familiar and simple it felt to be walking together like that with God, and I remember feeling surprised that it was so familiar and so simple – as though we already knew each other very well. You don’t have to see God to know him. And you already do know God, and he knows you. “Indeed he is not far from each one of us.”
Jesus told his disciples, "I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Advocate, to be with you forever. This is the Spirit of truth …. You know him, because he abides with you, and he will be in you.” Jesus, the Father and the Spirit are all connected with each other and with us, so when we encounter God, it will probably feel familiar rather than strange and frightening. In a way, this can make God’s presence hard to recognize. If we are expecting God to be completely different from anything we know, we may be surprised to encounter God in a way that feels close and familiar. Philip, one of Jesus’ disciples, asked him, “Lord, show us the Father, and we will be satisfied.” And Jesus said, “Have I been with you so long, and yet you do not know me, Philip? He who has seen me has seen the Father.”Don’t make it more difficult than it is – you know this already Sometimes, we can make things more difficult than they are. Some things are difficult and complicated; that’s true. But some things are simple, and we make them complicated when they don’t need to be. For example, how do you feel about Algebra? x + 2 = 5 Solve for x. If you’re like me, just hearing ‘ x’, you feel a mild panic. But relax and think about it – slow down. You already know this. It’s actually familiar. If you start with 2, how do you get to 5? You have to let yourself recognize the familiar parts and realize that you know them so that you don’t panic or give up. Don’t make it more difficult than it is. For some people, reading and spelling cause the panic. How do you spell ‘Episcopalian’? It’s so long and has all those syllables! I can’t do it. Yes, you can – slow down – listen to the sounds. What are the letters that make those sounds? Just do one at a time. You already know this. It’s actually familiar. Don’t make it more difficult than it is. Learning to read is similar – for someone learning to read, looking at all those words can be intimidating. They’ll just start guessing. You have to tell them, “Slow down, look at what’s there; don’t guess.“ When it connects – that those letters represent familiar words – it’s like epiphany – like revelation. Knowing God is similar. It may seem intimidating or even impossible to think about trying to know God. How can I know God? I’ve never seen God. God is totally ‘other’ – completely beyond human comprehension. Except that Jesus and Paul both say it’s not like that. We’re God’s children, Paul explains, so we know God already, because God made us and takes care of us. In him we live and move and have our being, and He is not far from each one of us. We know the Spirit, Jesus says, because he is with us and will be in us. God is familiar, even if we can’t put words to it or explain it. So don’t worry about what you can’t see, what you don’t know; look at what’s there. We’ve seen God reflected to us in thousands of ways. We’ve seen God reflected through people and events; we’ve seen God reflected through the beauty of the world around us; we’ve seen God reflected in scripture, in the liturgy, and we’ve seen God reflected in our own hearts. CS Lewis says we each have a ‘God-shaped hole’ in our hearts, so even before we recognize what’s missing in our lives, the shape of the emptiness traces an outline of what God must be like to fill it. Don’t make knowing God more difficult than it is – you already know God. And He knows you. -------------------------------------- Given to St. John's, Silsbee April 27, 2008
